Lisa
Lisa
I’m not ashamed of who I am anymore
I would leave work and be afraid my curling iron was still on so I had to keep going back to check. I was terrified it would start a fire. I could envision the salon up in flames.
Although she lives just 10 minutes from the hair salon where she worked, it often took Lisa an hour and a half to drive home.
The obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) that debuted with patterned knuckle cracking at age 12 was still there later in life. But other obsessions took over. So certain was she that the pothole she hit driving her car was actually a person, she spent hours going to and from the scene to recheck. Her mind replayed images of her younger sister being murdered—a gruesome event that never actually happened.
“If being vocal will help even just one person understand, it’s worth it.”
Eventually, with the support of her family, she checked into a 10-week exposure therapy program at Massachusetts’ McLean Hospital. There she also learned tools to cope with OCD.
My husband dropped me off with a duffel bag, and it was the scariest thing I’ve ever done. But, it was also the best. They made me face my fears. With my coach, I spent hours replaying what my mind told me was my sister’s death—in graphic detail.
Despite the severity of her condition, Lisa says many of her friends and family members did not know about it until she wrote them a letter explaining OCD and its crippling symptoms.
She also asked for donations for her first-time participation in the 1 Million Steps For OCD walk. Since then, Lisa’s team has grown to about 25 people.
It felt so good to come out and say it. I was surprised at the response I received from people with donations and cards with kind words. I’m not ashamed of who I am anymore.
Lisa is continuing outpatient therapy, attends OCD meetings, and enjoys spending time with her husband, son, family, friends, and work family at her salon.
She believes that being open about mental health will help trim the stigma associated with it.
With mental health challenges, you suffer from the inside. No one can see what’s wrong with you. If being vocal will help even just one person understand, it’s worth it.
