Eva
Eva
My value is not based on how I look
After Eva read an article describing body dysmorphic disorder (BDD), she finally had a name for the feelings she had been living with for more than 15 years.
That article changed my life. Now I had a name for my symptoms.
However, her psychiatrist was not familiar with BDD, as it was a poorly understood and often misclassified condition. Because of her presenting symptoms, she was diagnosed with depression.
Medication and talk therapy helped. The meds quieted the obsessive thoughts, and therapy helped with my negative thoughts and feelings about my appearance.
After two years, Eva discovered that more work was necessary. A somatic therapist became especially important, helping her address unresolved negative experiences from her childhood. For many people, BDD is linked to childhood trauma, such as teasing, bullying, and exposure to parental conflict or criticism. In her case, these early dynamics shaped her core beliefs about her self-worth.
Day-to-day recovery involved learning how to live without compulsive behaviors dominating my life.
It took many years of therapy before Eva truly understood what she was living with: BDD. In fact, Eva’s recovery involved multiple approaches. She came to understand that while cognitive behavioral therapy is often considered a gold standard for mental health treatment, it is not the only path forward.
“Acceptance does not mean accepting that one is ugly: That belief belongs to the disorder. True acceptance means acknowledging the presence of a mental health condition that distorts your perception.”
Mindfulness and acceptance-based therapies helped her manage symptoms and eventually allowed her to transition off medication.
There is no single, perfect model for recovery. …There is not one right path.
She really took to the acceptance-based approach to treatment, as it allowed her to confront things she believed to be true about herself that were not in fact accurate.
Acceptance does not mean accepting that one is ugly: That belief belongs to the disorder. True acceptance means acknowledging the presence of a mental health condition that distorts your perception.
The shame associated with BDD and other mental health conditions often stems less from the diagnosis itself and more from the belief that one is fundamentally defective.
Eva notes that societal messages often deepen feelings of shame by treating appearance as a form of social currency. Social media intensifies this pressure by promoting narrow, curated standards of beauty that can feel unrealistic and unattainable.
Over time, constant comparison can lead people to tie their sense of worth to how closely they match what they see.
Cosmetic procedures like plastic surgery can be extremely triggering for people with BDD, reinforcing the belief that their appearance concerns are valid and permanent.
Eva eventually transitioned from patient to advocate. She promotes greater awareness of BDD through her book and website and by sharing her recovery story. She aims to provide hope for individuals feeling stigmatized by BDD, and those who are stigmatized by their own internal beliefs.
Proudly, Eva facilitates peer support groups and shares resources for individuals with BDD and for caregivers of people diagnosed with BDD. She wants people struggling with BDD to know that they don’t have to struggle forever.
For me, having a diagnosis did not erase the pain, but it reframed it from a personal failure into a treatable mental health condition. Thankfully, our brains have an incredible capacity to adapt and change throughout our lives.
