Paul
Paul
I flew under the radar for 54 years
Paul was diagnosed with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) at the age of 54.
I had no idea when I was younger. Unfortunately, this is often the story of the ADHD inattentive type.
They are the ones who fly under the radar, and I definitely flew under the radar for 54 years.
Paul explains that many people with ADHD, particularly those with the inattentive type, are very resourceful at developing coping mechanisms that make it seem to others as if nothing is amiss, but “inside you know something’s wrong, and eventually it eats away at you.”
In public school and in college, I was very distracted, easily bored, a daydreamer.
My head was in the clouds all the time, and it’s amazing to me that I did as well as I did.
I now know that I survived by putting a lot of mental energy into school and work, but at the time I didn’t realize I was working harder than everyone else to achieve the same results.
Paul says that certain comments made about him as a child and as an adult further suggest that he had been living with ADHD for years, and that his ADHD may be hereditary.
My mother used to frequently tell me that I talked too much and that I would start things and never finish them, just like my father.
“While life can still be challenging, especially being the parent of a teenager with ADHD, the treatment and support I have received has given me a sense of hope and confidence that I had never before experienced.”
The same patterns continued into Paul’s adult life, and he became increasingly aware that working harder didn’t always produce the required results.
At 42, Paul adopted a baby boy, who was later diagnosed with ADHD in elementary school.
I saw the signs of distraction and impulsivity in my son early on, and as I read more about it, I began to wonder if I too might have ADHD.
Paul learned that it is a common occurrence for a parent of a child with ADHD to discover their own ADHD diagnosis in the process of helping their child.
Eventually, Paul sought help from a psychiatrist who confirmed his diagnosis, and he worked with an ADHD coach who helped Paul find the best ways to address his ADHD challenges.
In the process, he developed a strong sense of empathy and understanding for his son’s challenges with ADHD, which allowed him to be a better advocate for his son’s treatment and support while navigating his own diagnosis and treatment.
Even though I was not diagnosed with ADHD until I was 54, it was a relief to finally understand the many challenges I had endured throughout the years.
While life can still be challenging, especially being the parent of a teenager with ADHD, the treatment and support I have received has given me a sense of hope and confidence that I had never before experienced.
Paul has also discovered another positive outcome from his ADHD diagnosis.
I have come to embrace that I am just like my father in many ways—creative, compassionate, and resilient—which are positive attributes of many people with ADHD.
Many experts in the ADHD field encourage you to focus on your strengths, so my continuous goal is to do that, not only for myself, but for my son as well.
