Marilyn
Marilyn
Decide to live your best life possible
Do not allow your fear of what others think to rob you of living the fullest life possible.
Marilyn’s journey toward mental wellness began following a mental health crisis—a crisis she did not at first understand.
The year of 1993 found me wrestling with a call to ministry, my now deceased mother’s diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease, and a brother with a substance use disorder.
These three simultaneous, challenging life events took me over the edge.
While I had always had some symptoms of anxiety growing up in an alcoholic home, this chronic and long-term stress resulted in a crescendo that climaxed with a diagnosis of panic disorder.
Her diagnosis did not come until almost a year later, after she began to experience severe panic attacks coupled with dizziness and spasms in her hands and feet.
My initial consult regarding what was transpiring with me was with my pastor.
These attacks had an otherworldly feeling to them. They would come out of nowhere, with symptoms that were difficult to describe to others.
Almost a year went by before Marilyn sought professional treatment. When she started getting help, she went through a barrage of medical tests to find a diagnosis. Nothing could pinpoint the problem.
Then, late one night, she heard an infomercial on television.
The host described everything that I was experiencing, and I sat up in bed recognizing that they were describing me!
Make the decision that you want to live your best life possible. We only pass this way once, so make every effort to experience it to its fullest.
Convinced that she had panic disorder, Marilyn decided to act. Unfortunately, mental health stigma almost kept her from seeking the care she needed.
Once I had the name for what I was experiencing, I then had to make a hard decision on what I was going to do about it.
At the time of my introductory journey into the darkness of mental health struggles, there was a great deal of stigma attached to these conditions.
The thought that I needed to seek help was unnerving.
It caused me great concern knowing that people would perceive me differently if they knew I had to seek mental health care.
For Marilyn, however, “not seeking treatment was not an option.”
My work was suffering. My health was suffering. I was experiencing significant weight loss.
My relationships were suffering as I watched my world getting smaller and smaller and as insomnia became a nightly occurrence.
My decision to turn to the mental health system helped me to regain my life.
I was at a crossroads in my life, and I was fortunate to be able to turn to a Christian mental health agency in my city at the time.
It was through the guidance of both a psychiatrist for medication management and a therapist utilizing cognitive behavioral therapy that I was able to begin a journey towards recovery from this condition.
“My relationships were suffering as I watched my world getting smaller and smaller and as insomnia became a nightly occurrence.
My decision to turn to the mental health system helped me to regain my life.”
Deciding to take difficult but necessary steps toward recovery turned Marilyn’s life around.
I remember when I had to take a 30-day leave of absence from work due to my condition.
Agoraphobia was trying to grip me to the point where I did not want to leave my home. At that point in my life, I was feeling like such a failure.
The disease was winning. But I made a decision that I was not going to give up without a fight.
I made up my mind that in no way this how I was going to spend the rest of my life.
I was determined to do all I could do to regain the life I had before this disease took hold.
Today, she urges others held back by stigma to fight the fear and move ahead with their lives.
Make the decision that you want to live your best life possible.
We only pass this way once, so make every effort to experience it to its fullest.
